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Dear Oprah: The headline, 'Oprah 'Embarrassed' By Her Weight' for an article posted by PopEater/Wire Services on the Internet has prompted me to write to you regarding your comments in the January issue of "O" magazine that you weigh 200 pounds.

To your embarrassment and chagrin and in spite of all the professionals at your side, you have created the opposite of what you desire. Your chagrin and embarrassment is understandable, but is counter productive.

It is not your fault you have struggled with maintaining healthy body weight, albeit, you know the health risks and have a cadre of professionals to guide you in your quest. The reason it isn't your fault is this:

Food is easy instant gratification. Food is a way to soothe oneself and to distract oneself or stuff down feelings. Unresolved emotional issues are at the core of anyone's inconsistent weight issues. Emotional, sexual and physical abuse (a.k.a. corporal punishment, spanking) are the most prominent emotional wounds that causes childhood and/or adult erratic body weight.

"...Two hours after that show, I started eating to celebrate - of course, within two days those jeans no longer fit!" This statement clearly indicates you are eating for comfort, for recognition and to extend the good feelings.
Ask yourself these questions to shed light on why food makes you feel better:

"As a child was this a food I ate for comfort?

"As a child was food a source of comfort?

"As a child was I offered food when I was unhappy?

"Are there wonderful memories of happy times connected with eating food or a particular food?

"Are there events and people that I associate with food?

"Was food the focal point for family gatherings and good times?

"Is food the focal point for gatherings and good times now?

"Do I eat some foods, because they make me feel good, and remind me of happier times?

Oprah, you know all the reasons to maintain healthy body weight. You want to be healthy. You know you want to take better care of yourself. You are embarrassed by what you see in the mirror-bulges and being out of shape. The answer lies in a single word. LOSE. Yes, Lose. No one wants to lose anything.

Psychologically, when we make the statement, 'LOSE weight,' the psyche experiences an immediate reaction to LOSS. It is not human nature to want to lose anything. People don't want to experience a loss. Loss hits emotional, sexual and physical abuse survivors harder, because they have experienced the loss of integrity, trust, dignity, and sense of authentic self. People do not want to lose their identity-albeit the body they see in the mirror is embarrassing, but it is preferable to feeling the feelings that are kept at bay with the distraction and comfort of eating. Nobody wants to be a loser-albeit for a good reason. We want to gain. We want to be thought of as a "Winner.' When you lose something you look for it.

Unconsciously, losing weight is losing a part of yourself-albeit a part you would rather not have-yet, unconsciously you don't want to lose it and you look to replace it when it is gone. The answer is: Stop dieting to LOSE WEIGHT!!!

There is a battle going on between your conscious and subconscious mind. Your conscious mind knows you need to maintain a healthy weight for your health and well-being-but your subconscious mind resists the process because, "Lose" is a negative command.

The secret is: Focus on what you want to gain not losing. What do you want to gain? What do you want to create? You create what you focus on. You become what you think about. If you focus on (think about) weight, you, struggle with weight. Focusing on creating health, happiness and peace of mind-is what you will achieve. When you know what you want...in positive terms...then the key is to look inward, heal the emotional wounds, change your beliefs about your experiences and forgive those who harmed you and forgive yourself. You will then achieve what you want-better health, self-esteem, fit and trim body, etc.

The majority of people are unable to access all the hidden emotional wounds that need healing, therefore, it is imperative to engage with a highly trained hypnosis professional. Talk therapy is inadequate to access the deepest emotional and spiritual wounding to heal what was caused by emotional, sexual and/or physical abuse trauma.

Hypnosis goes directly to the subconscious to transform what you want to gain/create...only then is change possible. Using the most powerful mind transforming technique ever developed...hypnosis... in a positive way helps you become fit, healthy, strong, physically trim and attractive, you will gain/create the body you desire.

When you change your subconscious belief system you will walk, talk, eat, dress and live like the thinner, healthier, stronger, more physically fit and more attractive person you truly are. Change the mental programming...changed behavior follows. When one's behavior changes, one's body changes. Oprah, I wish you well on your journey to gain/create the healthy and trim body, happiness, peace of mind and well-being that you deserve.

Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Author, "101 Great Ways To Improve Your Life." Dr. Dorothy has the unique gift of connecting people with a broad range of profound principles that resonate in the deepest part of their being. She brings awareness to concepts not typically obvious to one's daily thoughts and feelings. http://www.drdorothy.net